Orientation @ IMU

Disclaimer : Long post ahead.
Warning : Might cause discomfort of eyes and neck pain.
Note: Make sure you are in a comfortable position and have ample time on hand before proceeding to read this post.

So I had got through my 2-week-long orientation and 2 weeks of lecture too; no worries, I'm still alive & breathing. Thank God.

Orientation wasn't as nightmarish as what I heard from the seniors. Wasn't at all torturing, in fact, I thought it was real FUN. But I'm sure the new friends & wonderful OOs I met definitely contributed loads to the joy of orientation. Kudos to the orientation committee too, who'd all worked so hard to make it a success. Just so you know, the effort you guys put into this wonderful orientation is greatly appreciated by us. Salud.

It'll be yards long if I were to ever blog on everything about orientation, so I'll just touch on the tip of the iceberg for every event throughout the weeks, and let the pictures explain the rest.


First, the ice-breakers. Srsly we were DRENCHED! With water, soya sauce, eggs, flour, ink... But it was fun and whats more, my beloved group 9 (The Mix) won!!! It was indeed a great start, our spirits were so high, we even won all the cheer fights! (thanks to Min Yi's earth-shaking voice =p)



This was during dry ice-breakers. And yup, when I was clean and dry. =p And that siao kia with me is beloved Mr Orientation President...
(btw, I was wearing the orientation t-shirt... Theme: Checkmate. I simply love the word 'pawn' there on my sleeve...lol)



This was after wet ice-breakers, with our winning cheer Hoo-Hah!!!
Supper at mamak after that, along with 'interrogating sessions'... T.T (No pics to show.)



Next on was Indoor Treasure Hunt. It was sorta complicated and challenging, especially with the presence of dark knights and dark bishops whose job are to 'take our lives'. (and seriously they did scare the life out of us by ambushing and attacking us unaware) Indoor treasure hunt was supposed to be fun, with all the clue-searching in the dark and even a chess game at the end, but somehow it didn't went well for our group. For one reason, we kena sabotaged. Our clues were nowhere to be found, some were moved out of bearing, some were torn at the edge... even more, some disappeared and magically reappeared again when we went back to search for the 2nd time... Intentional or not, I wouldn't know. But still, we'd already tried our best. At least we won our chess game, which places us in 2nd last place. Not that bad... ^_^



We did have lots of fun during the mamak session after the exhausting hunt... Thanks Justin for the "who is this?" game!


Outdoor Treasure Hunt totally compensated for it. It was carried out at the Bkt Jalil park nearby. It was loads and loads of fun...and getting dirty. Pity the guys, with their half-naked bodies smeared with oil and ink and all... what a sight for us girls... =p (no, I'm not even half as horny as ahem.. other girls in my group; you know who u are!)
Just that the raw egg with twisties part was a little disgusting. Poor MinYi, she swallowed almost 3 quarters of that, while I ate the other one quarter. Moreover the smell of raw egg lingered in my mouth for ages... eww yucks!



And again, for treasure hunt, we champed it. So all the hardship we went thru were WELL WORTH!!!^_^



Jay dipping her hand into some unknown liquid (I figured out oil, kicap, water, chili sause, dried chili, carrots...) to find a 20 cents shilling...



Passing a ??? (some kind of vege) with our feet... it's darn slippery, coated with oil and all...



Our group OO leader, Sylvester and another guy, with the epic titanic pose... lololololol...



Bracing ourselves for the maggie mee bath... (it's cooked maggi mee, plus the ajinomoto soup, diluted with cold water) *find it quite refreshing though =p*




CF station, the best station of all. It's only posing and camwhoring...(our talent...muahaha) The theme for this photo is --- Stages of Human Growth. (note the dead person at the left end..ROFL)





Poor guys, doing "facial"... (it's flour plus cucumber and other unknown substance)








Wet, dirty, but happy us... at the end of the day... =p


And on Sunday, Track Trip. Out of IMU activity, that was. Our destination were Lot 10, BB Plaza, and Pavillion. No no, not to go shopping of course, but to film videos, commercials, and camwhore according to posters around the destination. And it doesn't matter one bit to us that people kept staring as if we were some out-of-mind idiots and all. (Eh, kua ha mi kua!!! Wa lang mm si xiao gai la...)
& the best thing was, on the way back to IMU, we sang The Bachelor Boy song all the way on the LRT. Damn enthu wei...


At the start of our track trip!!!



Posing as L'oreal girls...



Imitating the Padini poster behind us... with some sporting passer-bys (the couple on the right)




Posing as Tugu Negara, in Lot 10... which got us scolded by the shop owner in the end... T.T





Normal group photo in front of Pavillion, before we head back to IMU.

************

The second week came by, mostly comprised of performance-based events. Tuesday was Dress Code. It was some screening of videos that each of the orientation groups made earlier. We were all given a specific theme, which we were asked to film a video based on it. Our group's was trailer to a horror movie. And I was the ghost. (wuuuu wuuu) It took us quite a lot of effort, getting up at 6am to film the dark deserted IMU building and PBL rooms... but the reviews for our trailer were good, we even got a standing ovation!!! Even though in the end we lost by 2 marks to the leading team, we were still pretty satisfied about our work.


The next day we had Telematch. The most physically-challenging orientation activity. And the one which we got MOST DIRTY AND STINKY AND HURT... (It was a wonder how Wei Jin and I still manage to overcome the pain and dance on the next day, considering that he hurt his knees, had leg cramps twice while I had a large piece of skin scraped off my left feet... ouch!!!)
But what's more, ahem ahem... MORE TOPLESS GUYS!!! muahahahahahaha.....


We started off clean and fresh...



Caterpillar Walk!!! Across muddy grounds summore, serious, the mud even got into my underpants! Swt...



Decorating the guys to the theme - India. Srsly I don't know why butter on the nipples have anything to do with that theme... =.=




Posing with our 'masterpieces'... =p



Maheen wanted to take a bath...


Fore-and-aft method of transporting people to the other side @ First Aid station.



Seniors VS juniors Tug Of War...



Still going strong after telematch... we rock!!!


And still right the day after, we had Variety Nite. A night of stage performances. Perhaps the best and cleanest event we ever had in the whole orientation. But the practice part for our performance was friggin' hectic. Except for the dance part I was going to do with Wei Jin (yes, we were to dance a Rumba together instead of the usual lovey-dovey actings), which we prepared 2 days ago; everything else were last-minute. We finalized the plot only around 1am on the day of V.Nite itself. Discussed, practised and painted props till 4.30am in the morning before we finally headed off to bed... totally exhausted.


But guess what, WE WON VARIETY NIGHT!!! And to be frank, V.Nite was a blast. We had the most fun ever, despite all the previous hassle and frustration due to lack of time for preparation, unsettled plots, disagrement on stuff... etc...
Thanks everyone for the hard work you guys did to make this a success!!!


The preparation... our movie theme : Pirates of The Carribean



Jack Sparrow! Wonderful props and design right?


Davy Jones, the tentacle guy... He looks less scary with weeds as tentacles... =p


Gracias everyone who had made the performance a success...



Me and my partner, Wei Jin, in one of our Rumba move... Thanks everyone who love our dance. There were still many flaws really, but I really appreciate the support you guys gave us... ^_^

Finale Nite was on Friday, the last day of orientation. Just a dinner together, to watch performance, to dance, and to announce the overall winner for the M209 Orientation-Checkmate. The theme was Back And White. And for our ever-so-creative group 9, we went dressed in Black and White alrite, but... as OLD FOLKS. While everyone else were twirling around in elegant dresses and suits, we made our grand entrance, pushed around in wheelchair, holding walking sticks or bent over, walking in slow and shakily. I never knew dressing up as old people could be THAT fun. We even had a family tree planned out for that, complete with great grandfather, bachelor uncles, old spinsters, bimbotic aunts, old couples with rebelious children, and even a mistress (which is me, but still 103 years old.. oh no.. sorry I forgot, it's 102 only..)




Taking a group photo after making our grand entrance... lolx...



Great grandfather and great grandmother competing against the other groups for the Best Dressed Award.



Funny that at the end of the night, we looked much younger, and much more energetic. (the powder on our hair & our old ppl makeup wore off...=p)

Nevertheless, it was a night to remember, as our group was crowned THE OVERALL CHAMPION for M209 Orientation - Checkmate!!! Weeeeee!!!!



Rejoycing together.

(Sorry, I don't have the photo of us receiving the hamper from Mr Presie Joash yet... will upload next time when I get it.)

Before I end, let me shout out...

I heart you , group 9!!!

Till I Can Make It On My Own

Recently I'm pretty into this song. It's old really, not sure who was the original singer, but I just sorta stumbled upon the Billy Gilman's version not long ago. The lyrics captivates me a lot. And it sounds extra touching, with his kiddo voice and all. *winks*


What's more, it feels kinda like my theme song for now.. coping with my new life here. It's hard sometimes but, I'm sure I'll get on with it. I just wanna give thanks to God for blessing me with such great friends and seniors who stay with me through all these time. Not just to accompany me at times I might ever feel lonely, but to offer me advices along the way, picking me up whenever I fall, offering help whenever I need them... and yeah, till I can make it on my own.

But one thing for sure, even when I've fully adapted to life here and all in future, I won't wanna walk the rest of the way on my own. For I am happy being with you all.

I’ll need time, to get you off my mind, and I may sometimes bother you, try to be in touch with you, even ask too much of you from time to time, now and then, Lord you know I need a friend, till I get used to losing you, let me keep on using you, till I can make it on my own.

I’ll get by, but no matter how I tried, there’ll be times you know I’ll call, chances are my tears will fall, and I’ll have no pride at all, from time to time, but they say, How there’ll be a better day, but till then I’ll lean on you, that’s all I meant to do, till I can make it on my own.

Surely someday I’ll look up and see the morning sun, without another lonely night behind me, then I know I’m over you and all my crying’s done, and no more hurting memories will find me.

But till then, Lord you know I’m gonna need a friend, till I get used to losing you, let me keep on using you, till I can make it on my own, till I can make it on my own…


And gracias again guys for being there for me. ^_^

And to you Siao Kia, (although you always call me Siao Za Bo for who-knows-whatever-reason), I feel really blessed having a senior like you. ^_^
Thanks for the help, and thanks for the books. You'd patiently (though I'm sure sometimes you might be pissed off as well...lol...) answered all my questions & concerns, even the most random ones like where is the aircond place to eat in Sri Petaling... (okay srsly that wasn't my idea, it was under my group's request.. btw, sorry for bothering you at lecture T.T)

To grp 9 ppl : Gone ady la, what's left of my reputation!!! Sob...

Anyway, it's midnite so... ciao for now, thx Lau for the internet!!!

Shattered...

11.09.2009

How many times can I break till I shatter?

Everyone around me was asking me to chill. Be phlegmatic, they say. But surprisingly, I couldn’t.

It shocked me as well. I never, never used to lose my calm. Maybe this time was different. I didn’t know it meant so much to me.

I never knew.

It was not like any other feeling I remembered. It was this feeling as if the whole world came crashing down on you at that very moment. Speechless was all I could be. Maybe it would be better if I could cry. But surprisingly again, the tears just won’t come. And I just got stuck on the verge of breaking down.

It hurts. It friggin’ hurts. It stings like someone giving you a cold slap right on your face. And I so hope it could be a real slap instead. Even that might be better. At least the physical pain won’t last as long.

I never thought you would ever hurt me.

What made it a lot worse was that it wasn’t for once or twice. Four times. Yes, four. They tell me I gotta let it go. So I did. Once I did, twice I did… but I really don’t know why it kept coming back to me, time after time. Seriously, how many times can I take before I break?

So I left. I don’t want to stay another minute, I can’t bring myself to say another word, can’t even bear to have one more look.

I was afraid.

They wouldn’t understand. And I just couldn’t tell them. How could I ever tell when I myself was just as confused? This heart of mine, why oh why, even I couldn’t understand it now.

I’m shattered. But still, the tears won’t fall.

You see, this had nothing to do with you, even when everything’s about you. Maybe just between me and myself.

I really should have listened to my friends.

I’m still learning to forgive and forget.

Chaos!!!

I'm still packing, and it's almost 2am. This is what'll happen when you keep everything away till the last minute.
What should I bring? What should I not bring? Need it or need it not? I'm in a dilemma now, amongst these chaos. Someone please help me get this packing done! I want my beauty sleep... T.T


Gonna head off tomorrow morning to Bukit Jalil, where I'll start my uni life. It would be pretty exciting, if not for all that had happened and this packing-mess I'm in now... Would also appreciate it if that place is less isolated, if the rental could be lower, and if there is easier access to food & other necessities... Seriously, the price of accomodations at Vista is very unreasonable, weighing the unstrategic location and bad condition of the blocks. I gotta survive by a thread with only RM700+ per month.
Neways, no use complaining, just gotta make the best out of it. ^_^


And for now, goodbye home-cooked food, goodbye my Streamyx connection, goodbye Baby Yaw Yaw, goodbye my queen-size bed, goodbye guitar, goodbye my long fingernails and goodbye black nail polish... Adíos, adíos everything and everyone.


No worries, I'll be back. So wait for me! Till then...

Sigh, back to packing... *faints*

Rest In Peace...

Results day today. I almost forgot about it, if not for all the shoutouts and conversations of my friends on facebook. Many were already waiting by the computer hours ago, anticipating... It reminded me much of the SPM day where all of us were at school early, loitering around the corridor, with feelings almost similar to this. And I really really hate these type of anticipation and suspense... Argh!!!


But I didn't get to check my results until much later.

I had a funeral to attend in the morning. OMG a funeral. For my uncle who passed away yesterday, due to cardiac arrest. No one expected this to happen, I mean, he wasn't old enough to die. It was shocking news to us. It was said that he was playing badminton with his friends, and when he sat down to rest, he just... died.

And just as funerals are, it was depressing, sad, and gloomy. My uncle's family weren't Christians, so they had a traditional Chinese funeral, with rituals, chants, and joss-sticks. We helped folding paper money for the dead. I watched my cousins performing rituals after rituals, with red-rimmed eyes, and tear-stained cheeks... it was heart-breaking, really. Hard as it is for all of us who lost a relative, it sure is double the pain to lose your own father.


They cloud of sorrow stayed on later at the cremation centre. It was the first time I'd ever been there, but I wish I never had to. There were rows of rooms equiped with furnaces, and there were tracks for the coffins to be rolled into the furnace... It was sorta, just like a factory. Everything was so... business-like. Made me wonder how lifeless could the dead be. *dunno if you get what I mean*


Neways, there was this one other family beside ours at the centre, performing the last ritual. And the one thing that caught my attention was that their coffin wasn't just like any other I'd ever seen. It was... small. Unmistakably a child's coffin. Such a devasting sight.
Why oh why?
Children were supposed to be running about; playing with toy cars, dolls and balls; putting off their homeworks for tomorrows which are sure to come; enjoying a dance class or two; talking about what they will be in future; waiting impatiently to grow up... And not lying cold and lifeless in tiny coffins.
No, no, no...


Rest in peace, uncle. Rest in peace, child. Let the families get over the grief of losing their loved ones, I pray. Bless my aunt and my cousins, guide them through this tough period of life. Father, grant us all from now on, more of joy and less of sorrow I pray. Have mercy. Amen.

And dear Father, thanks for my results.

Szomorú Vasárnap

So I had promised to talk about Gloomy Sunday yesterday... which for whatever reason it was, I didn't want to talk about since yesterday was a Sunday. *ignore this idk what I'm crapping*

Well, for a start, it's positively one of my all-time-favourite song. I've never heard any other song like this. Yes, it's extremely beautiful, even when it's painful. Can't even say it's sad, it's something way beyond boundaries that word could ever reach.

Oh, the lyrics...!
No wonder it was dubbed the Hungarian suicide song in the US. It was said to have inspired hundreds of suicide cases, even including the song composer himself, Rezső Seress. To the extend that the song had to be banned in some places... Sort of meta-legend. *idk, believe it or not*

According to Wiki, the song was composed based on a Hungarian poem "Szomorú Vasárnap", in which the singer mourns the untimely death of a lover and contemplates suicide.

This is the literal English translation of the poem...

Gloomy Sunday with a hundred white flowers
I was waiting for you my dearest with a prayer
A Sunday morning, chasing after my dreams
The carriage of my sorrow returned to me without you
It is since then that my Sundays have been forever sad
Tears my only drink, the sorrow my bread...

Gloomy Sunday

This last Sunday, my darling please come to me
There'll be a priest, a coffin, a catafalque and a winding-sheet
There'll be flowers for you, flowers and a coffin
Under the blossoming trees it will be my last journey
My eyes will be open, so that I could see you for a last time
Don't be afraid of my eyes, I'm blessing you even in my death...

The last Sunday

**************

And here is the beautifully depressing song lyrics.

Sunday is gloomy,
My hours are slumberless,
Dearest, the shadows I live with are numberless
Little white flowers will never awaken you
Not when the black coach of sorrow has taken you
Angels have no thought of ever returning you
Would they be angry if I thought of joining you?
Gloomy Sunday

Gloomy is Sunday
with shadows I spend it all,
My heart and I have decided to end it all
Soon there'll be candles and prayers that are said I know,
But let them not weep,
Let them know that I'm glad to go...
Death is no dream,
For in death I'm caressing you
With the last breath of my soul I'll be blessing you
Gloomy Sunday

Dreaming,
I was only dreaming
I wake and I find you
Asleep in the deep of my heart
Dear,
Darling I hope that my dream never haunted you
My heart is telling you how much I wanted you
Gloomy Sunday

*author is not in any way responsible for any suicide or depression caused by the contents of this post...*
Happy appreciating the beauty of this song, everyone. ^_^

So I'm Already Gone

Reviews again! So here's for Week 7...

x Have fun. Yeah, loads of great fun with everyone. (Yeah. Buckets and buckets of fun. Had them all kept asking for me even before I got there; had nice chats; laughed at jokes; had a last admirational look at the pretty dance shoes in The Shoes Book, as we all call it; Zili finally came back & danced the Rumba routines with me for the last time; had some tiring Jive; did double spins in the warm-ups; Edwin belanja sweets; Sifu fetched me home... )


One thing to note, I even got the keys from Sifu and went up to the dark-dusty-abandoned 3rd floor(attic) of the building just for a fun adventure, alone. I'm really sorry I spent too long up there till I made everyone worried and sent Zili and Joey up to check on me x.x

It was real cool there. Almost exactly like those abandoned flat units we saw in horror movies, minus the ghost. There were even rooms with spider webs all over the door handles, mouldy balcony, water-marks on the ceiling, a table and chairs covered with dust, loads of old stuff piled up in a corner, and a white board with these words scribbled on it...



Lolololol... you'd thought it was something like HELP ME or I WILL KILL YOU rite? Nah, don't let your imaginations run too wild. ^_^ But I really love the verse --- YOU CAN WALK, YOU CAN DANCE!!! *there's even a chinese version below there...*
I wonder if it was another of Sifu's theory. But it's pretty inspiring! I wonder why is that whiteboard stacked away in the dark dusty attic, cuz if it was to be hung outside the studio door, guess it will give many people the courage and confidence to take up dancing!!!

Maybe it was purposely hidden so far away and only people who are adventurous enough to go up the dark and heavily-blocked staircase will find it. As usually lessons of life can't be learnt the easy way mar... *this hypothesis of mine isn't really possible*
Anyway, another lesson learnt from the trip to the attic!!! ^_^



x Give my best for everything, routines or warm-ups. (Sure I did! Routines still weren't perfect, still lotta stumble and flaws. Still sorry Zili for being a lousy partner... But no regrets, for I'd already tried my best. Just that I need to be better. I'll work on it, even when I'm gone. Promise.)

x Give that song lyrics for little Xiu Xin as I'd already promised. (I'm not one who breaks promises easily.)

x Accept Sifu's car-ride back home. This might be the last time I'll ever be on her cute-cutely decorated car... *awww... emo emo!!!* (Thanks for the car-ride again, Sifu! And all the car-rides in the past. I still remember all the laughs and chats we had in the car-rides home since last time. The things that you told me, life lessons you taught me, questions that you asked me, advices that you gave me... For everything, thank you again, so much. You're awesome! And just as I'd always told you, once my Sifu, forever my Sifu!!! I'll miss you so.)

x Say goodbye and hope to meet you again someday to everyone. (T.T)


******* ******* *******


Carino's right, it's always hard to say goodbye. One more week before I'm leaving Ipoh and this life that I had for the past 2 months. For a new phase of life, still pretty much unknown, ahead.

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories, they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

Yes, we were.
There got to be changes in life. Not that I dislike them, but sometimes, there's just part of me that doesn't want anything to change, because I'm happy with life as it is now. I love life as it is now.

You know that i love you so
I love you enough to let you go

Sometimes, the only thing left that is right is to let go. Who knows if better things are to come?

I want you to know
That it doesn't matter
Where we take this road
Someone's gotta go

This time, I'm the one.

Just a word I wanna change here:
There IS moving on
So i'm already gone

I'm moving on. But not forgetting, these memories.

I'll be back. Wait for me.


Picture credits to Ok4mi
Btw, thanks Kelly.

Week 7 - Gloomy is Sunday

16th of August (Sunday) ----- 2.35 a.m.

And again, another week goes by. Trying to stall time is almost as grasping threads of wind with my bare hands. Not that I didn't like the prospect of going to uni soon, but still, there is this lazy part of Jiyi who wishes her holiday (and dance classes with Sifu) could last on till forever. *lol... I'm hopeless*

Tomorrow's gonna be my last dance class. Expectations? There sure are many but I can't really think of them now with this tired mind of mine... Guess I'll leave that for later? *typical my-style-procrastinating* Just one thing, I wish I'll have a great time. Sure do!
..............
..............
..............
There's still stuff I wanna blog about but... I'm so tired I can't really think straight now...
So... nighty nitez!

*******

16th of August (Sunday) ----- 12.15 pm

So I had only just woke up about an hour ago... *yawnn*
Sleeping late = waking up late... Seriously, I gotta get my life back on track.

But now, checklist for Week 7!

_ Have fun. Yeah, loads of great fun with everyone.
_ Give my best for everything, routines or warm-ups.
_ Give that song lyrics for little Xiu Xin as I'd already promised.
_ Accept Sifu's car-ride back home. This might be the last time I'll ever be on her cute-cutely decorated car... *awww... emo emo!!!*
_ Say goodbye and hope to meet you again someday to everyone.


Notice that I didn't really put as much stress on myself about routines and all as the past weeks? Well I guess, for once, dancing seems not so important as spending some precious moments with people that I'll miss when I leave...

I'll miss I'll miss I'll miss...

*******

For Sundays like these, it doesn't help when Gloomy Sunday is playing over and over again on my playlist. T.T

OMG, it's like the most beautifully painfully sad song I'd ever heard. Seriously, it sends chills down my spine... brrr...


Why? You'll know, but I'm gonna leave this for later too. I'm hungry now. Time for lunch!!! lolololol....


P/S: Happy 16th, Carino!!!

Week 6 - Failed...!

One routine done. Only one more lesson to go. Seriously, I really don't feel like saying goodbye just yet. Actually, I never will.

Sentiments aside, I think I failed Week 6. Sobzzz sobzzzzz.....T.T
Let me review my checklist, and you'll know why.

x Get my heel protectors! (Yup, got a pair of P-2s!)

_ Work on my confidence. (You'll know why I failed this after you read on.)

_ Work on those feet. Especially balancing. (Gone are the balance...!!! Extra long spinning warm-ups made our heads spin like hell, poor YiWen had to hold on to the barre, another gal crossed my track & almost crashed into me, and I almost crashed into the mirrors...)

_ Work on postures and lines. Arm extensions, in particular. (I tell you, my lines were HORRIBLE!!! Those feet, I can't seems to ever get them right... *sobs*)

_ And again, don't look at feet! KEEP HEAD UP!!! (Unavoidable as I need to check on my feet which are often out of position... *sobbing even louder*)

_ Get a hang of the routines faster. At least same pace with the seniors. (The fact that I didn't cross this out is pretty much self-explanatory. *nearing breakdown* )

_ Don't get teased or scolded by Sifu. (Like I will never get bashings after all the mistakes and failures above?!! Fat chances! I wasn't the only one but still, that thought never helped one bit. Sorry I dissapointed you, Sifu.)

Yup, THAT CRAP was Week 6.
And yup, you've seen right, I had only 1 out of 7 crossed x out in my entire checklist.
And that one single thing was like, get heel protectors? How hard could that be?


*******
And very unlucky for us, there was a minor incident. The studio's power fuse was burnt midway through our lesson. When we were doing our centre point warm-ups to some music, suddenly the music went off and the whole place went black. T.T
So for the rest of the lesson, we had to dance in the "dark", without music too. It should be kinda romantic, if not for the heat that M'sia The Tropical Country is well known for. Man, we were perspiring mad thru the routines.

But still, that was no excuse for my failure. I should've worked harder. One thing, I didn't give in my fullest effort for that day, which is what I should be blamed for. I'm sorry, really sorry. Promise it won't happen again next time.


*******
When I went to get my heel protectors from Sifu, she sat on the floor helping me fit them in, when another gal asked her if she can have a pair too. Sifu said no, you hadn't had much acheivements yet. The gal was perplexed, why not? And I too was quizzical. So I asked her, huh?!! Then, do I? And she answered, well, a little!

I didn't know if she was joking or not. I couldn't see her face. Seriously I had always thought I was the worst in the entire class, since the rest of the students have at least more than one year of experience. Does Sifu really think that I had improved a little? I thought I was always a dissapointment. You may think, what's the big deal about such a mere comment? But you wouldn't know, how much it meant to me. You see, very rarely Sifu ever gives decent comments about everyone, and when she does, you sure should be real happy. Now you get me?

Neways, I know for sure that I'm still not up to standard yet. And looking from the way Week 6 went, I know that I'm not even close. Sifu used to advise me never to give what I'd learnt all back to her when I leave, and I'll hang on to that advise. I remember there was this other senior who told me the same thing, once you stop, you have to keep all da techniques persistent with you.. if not, you're gonna loose them someday!

*No worries, Jiyi will keep that in mind.*


Week 7 will be my last week there. I pray that it'll be much better. If not, I really won't be able to forgive myself.
Note to self: Have to work on the Rumba Roll that took me so long to figure out..*dummy me*

But for now, can I have some California Sushi Roll and Ebiko please??? Awww... I'm craving for you... scrumptilicious!!!!

August Rush

Zoom! And hereby announcing the arrival of the 2nd week of August! Awww mann, why do time wanna past so fast huh? Tomorrow, well, today actually, will be my 2nd last lesson with Sifu. God knows when I can be back again. Awww...Nostalgic!

I'm so gonna miss them all.
The lessons which are a drill but enjoyable all the same, the studio which is almost comfy like home, the talkative students who are normally quite hyperactive but great dancers, the pretty-gentle-loving Sifu whose wit and quirk can never be challenged, her friendly husband who smiles all the time, equally friendly and cute Ah Nee Aunty who's most fun to be around with, the parquette floor which often have pieces of wood coming off and glued back on, the long tall mirrors which is often 'stained' by kid's fingerprints, the solid steel barre which acts as our trusted 'partner' when there aren't enough boys, the comfy coach with all those huggable little cushions...
Just so many things I won't forget there.

Why oh why shall I have to leave? But that's the way the story goes. Just as the many times I used to leave and ask this same question over and over again... However unlike those last times, this time, I'm not quite sure when I'll be back. You know the holidays in IMU... ain't really sufficient actually.

Guess I'll just have to keep my fingers crossed and hope it won't be that long a wait.


In the meantime... checklist for week 6!

_ Get my heel protectors!
_ Work on my confidence.
_ Work on those feet. Especially balancing.
_ Work on postures and lines. Arm extensions, in particular.
_ And again, don't look at feet! KEEP HEAD UP!!!
_ Get a hang of the routines faster. At least same pace with the seniors.
_ Don't get teased or scolded by Sifu.


Any hopes of getting them all crossed off ASAP?
Anyway, I still remember the theory---hush hush, don't rush!!!
So I'll just give in my best, and we'll see... ^_^

I wonder... and I've learnt

Even as a child I had been curious.
I used to wonder why the leaves are green, why the sky is blue.
Why the children can be so happy, why the adults can be so moody.
Why the kind old man next door always had a lot of visitors in his house, why the grumpy aunty down the street was always lonely.

And as I grow older, sometimes I wonder how this world came to be.
I wonder how God works, and how Satan works in this world.
I wonder how mankind on this earth, could be so different from each other.

And today. I'll talk about people. Yes, those class-A mammals/homo sapiens/complex beings with even complex mind/sinners... whatever you call them.

Throughout my 19 years of life, I've seen people. Lots and lots of people. Different people. And there are people I forgot, people I treasure, people who are worthy and unworthy. It might come out harsh, but still, UNWORTHY... what else could subtly describe that precisely? Perdón for my lack of vocabulary.

*******

I wonder how some people demand for respect when they themselves are not respecting others at all. Que ironia ven? Sadly funny, in a way. I always believe that respectable people will gain respect automatically. They don't even need to DEMAND for it if they proved themselves worthy.

The act itself is sometimes, as evil blow itself up in a pale parody of the human being, which only made us giggle like children at their foolish pomposity.
Why so?
Imprudente.

*******

I used to be sympathetic for outcasts, but I guess I gotta re-evaluate my notion. I'd came to see that there must be a reason to that. And very often, reasons that speak for themselves. Like there's this little mirror reflecting everyone's heart, if you take the time to read them, it's all pretty much self-explanatory.

~~~
Now I know why Sifu is so pretty. Her beauty comes from within. Reflected on that little mirror, I think. Brings radiance to her face.

And one thing, she never brags much.

Unlike some.

*******

When I was young, there was this counting song that every kindergarten kid knew by heart, "Ten Green Bottles"...
"So many!!!" my little cousin will say. Yeah, diez!!! It's all of your fingers together, kiddo!
That was then, you could when you're five years old.
But then again, now I'd seen some people who just never learnt to grow up. Lástima en ellos.

Dissapointing.

*******
Schadenfreude. Yes, haven't you met one before?

*******

Lesson learnt---Never to believe in anyone, except those who LOVE you. Not like, not close, not anything. Just love. Love that takes no account of sacrifices. Takes no account of anything.
And to be frank, there just ain't many out there.

One thing I'd say, life's lessons aren't normally enjoyable to learn. Unlike dance lessons. ^_^

*******
It's Monday again.
Yesterday's lesson was a drill. Yup, Sifu's back. No more chit-chatting or lazing around the barre. But I'm happy that Sifu's finally back.

Dumped our routine yesterday. Instead, we had warm-ups, that's what Sifu call them. I guess it's some new techniques she learnt from her 2-week China trip. Wow, and sure enough, some drilling it was!!! Techniques for cucuracha/hip movements, directions, centre point, Rhumba walk and all those spinning and twisting... continuous 10 minutes for each training. It was alright for the others, but imagine spinning for 10 minutes! We were stopping, bumping into each other and crossing tracks at 8 minutes. Were seeing stars and slumped to the floor at the end of the song.

So much for improving over the 2 weeks. Sifu was devasted. So it's the same dose of teasing, fired at almost everyone. Lolx.. at least, I wasn't the only one.

And we had a great time. Had great chats. Dance is a blessing. You are a blessing.


I think that for every bad that we had in our lives, we'll have good too.

God looks after His children. God gives us what is best for us.
God is fair. God is good. Amen!


And again, I've learnt.

Checklist :

x Don't scream when performing the drop at the end of the routine.
(Yup, got tat pretty well done! I can even extend my left hand, turn my head and uhh... smile!)

x Don't get teased or scolded again today.
(Finally! But Sifu wasn't here so... can't be too optimistic yet.)

x Look!!!!! at your partner!!!
(Thanks Zili, you're a great partner!)

x Do the 180 degrees spin smoothly.
(Can still do it today. I even got straighter at my double spins!)

_ SMILE!!! Don't look like everyone owes you money!
(Wasn't satisfied with my smile, cuz it was more like tensed curl of my lips, especially during the pair by pair accessment... T.T)

_ Move more steadily and confidently, don't sway and swagger.
(Well, guess I was steadier this time, but still, there's room for improvement, so I'll KIV for this part...)

_ Don't look at feet!!! KEEP HEAD UP!!!
(Better than last time. But I did too occasionally looked down, so I gotta be strict to myself, and ban crossing this out until I TOTALLY DID NOT look down unnecessarily.)


Sifu isn't back yet today. She'll be away for 2 weeks, Ah Nee aunty told me. Aww... I miss her. Ah Nee aunty is great too, but I still love Sifu the most. I won't mind listening ONCE to "Love Song Of XiZhang" if only she could be back.
But guess I could only wait till next week to see her again.

In the meantime, I'll strive to make the last 3 cuts of my checklist. And for more to come next week. Think I'll give myself till next Sunday to perfect my split.

Gonna be off to sleep now. Gruelling starts tomorrow. Gotta be ready for the pain... ^_^

Como Ama Una Mujer

Cuando te encuentras conmigo a solas

Y tengo tanto para decirte
en lo que quieras yo voy a seguirte
*No hablemos nada oye el silencio
es el lenguaje de nuestros cuerpos
Y a veces pienso que apareciste
para mostrarme que el amor existe*

Tu, todo tu
Siempre tu
Todo tu.

On a side note, I bet this'll gotta make a nice choreograph...!

*Let nothing be heard, the silence
is the language of our bodies;
And sometimes I think you appear,
to show me that love exists.*

Captivating, really captivating. And I mean, everything. Guess what's on my playlist? All-time favs -Tu and Como Ama Una Mujer by none other than, mi esposa. Mi amada esposa.
Oh Jenny, Jenny... why could you always captivate my heart?

*Quizas porque tan solo he sido una
Que ha sido enamorada de la luna
Tan solo eso ha sido mi pecado
El de seguir mi corazon a todos lados
Seguir mi loco corazon a todos lados

Y he amado como ama una mujer
Que ve en su hombre el paraiso...*

Beautiful. It's beautiful. It touches the depths of my soul. I wonder if I had gotten much more sentimental than I already was these days, but really, which other dummy cries watching SYTYCD? I guess it's only me.

Me who cries like a woman.
Me who loves like a woman.
Well, I'm (going-to-be-not-yet-but-soon) a woman.

*Maybe because I had been so alone,
Whom had only been in love with the moon;
So was my only sin
to follow my heart to all directions,
To follow my crazy heart everywhere.

And I loved like how a woman loves,
who sees paradise in her man...*

So you got what I mean by beautiful?

*******

Neways, updates. I've been catching up with SYTYCD Season 5 lately. There's so much emotion going on in the show!!! It's like the nicest production I've ever watched, seriously. There's dance, there's out-of-this-world skills and talents, there's love, there's passion, there's drama, there's lessons and values...
I see people. Lots and lots of people. Different people. Black people, white people, growing people, never-give-up people, rude people, cannot-take-critism people, guys with long hair, gals with shaved heads, big boys who cries, young ladies who stick together...
Inspiring. Sat watching with gaping mouth at what a dancer really is.


Back to my feet, I know I still have a long way to go. Maybe never gonna make it like them. Maybe never gonna touch the sky. I started late, and one mistake is able to last forever. But you see, the best is not about reaching the heights, it's about still hanging on even though you know you might never gonna reach it.

"I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself." ~ Mikhail Baryshnikov

And so shall I. ^_^

*******

Gotta go. Dance class starting in an hour's time, and I don't wanna be late. Hope Sifu's already back from China. And hope she wouldn't play that "Love Song Of XiZhang" for us to dance to today. Believe me, it's the worst song to go with Rhumba. =.=

Checklist for today:
x Don't scream when performing the drop at the end of the routine.
_ Don't get teased or scolded again today.
_ Look!!!!! at your partner!!! (if you were assigned one today)
x Do the 180 degrees spin smoothly.
_ SMILE!!! Don't look like everyone owes you money!
_ Move more steadily and confidently, don't sway and swagger.
_ Don't look at feet!!! KEEP HEAD UP!!!


Wish I can check the rest off ASAP. Pray for me.


P/S: Cariño, mi ángel de la guarda, te extraño mucho mucho.

La tuya.

A Little Before Goodnight

So, it's like the ???th week after the day I left INTEC. Seriously I have no idea. Was it the 3rd? Or 4th?

Totally lost track of time. Externals seems like centuries ago. FINE!!! Not that I wanted to be constantly reminded about it too. Let it hibernate with the dinosaurs, as far as I'm concerned. It's almost as scary as dinos anyway, well, on second thought, SCARIER.


Guess I'd better enjoy my life to the fullest before it gets miserable... *which I prayed hard it won't*


movies, MOVIES, mov-iiieeeees!!!!


I'd been watching oh-so-many movies, reality shows, TVB dramas... these days.
Mornings are for Berniceeeeee, JLOooooo... oh my wifey(s)...!!!

Afternoons are for SYTYCD season 5 - *who's going to be America's next favourite dancer?* ( C'mon get your tickets, you're going to VEGASSSSSSS!!!!!!)
It gets me really hyped too, seeing people getting hyped over all the VEGAS-hoo-hah. But mom was like :"Why so hyped? It's not YOU who's going to Vegas!"
(yeah, I know but, talk about slapping cold water on your face!)


So since I'm not going to Vegas, nights are for shopping-online-skyping-eating supper-daydreaming-reading-eating junk food-sleeping..... zzz...zzzZZZZ


Actually I should be blogging about my lovely Sarawak trip, but I find it quite a tremendous work to do for now, so I guess I'll leave it for another post...okie? Sorry folks!
But here's an insight --- It'll mostly be about yummy yummy food, cheap cheap stuff and nice, friendly people!!!



So I'll talk about the anniversary dinner and dance instead. It's just as amazing as last year's. I guess better. The senior students are getting better and better over the year. (Despite all the pre-performance hassle; like someone forgetting to bring costumes, forgetting what costume they were supposed to wear or someone losing his shoes...well, kids are kids.) I guess Sifu will surely be proud of them. I am too.
And the costumes are ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC this year!!! So shimmery and colourful!!! Beads, sequins, furs, feathers... you name it, they have it. I was the one assigned to be in charge of the costumes, so I get to have a good look and touch of them. ^_^
Sifu's designs and handwork are getting more and more amazing. Yup, all the costumes are made/co-made by her, so she's like dancer-teacher-designer-children caretaker... Well, I can only say... WOW!!!


Watching people dance is one thing, dancing myself is another. One is pure enjoyment, the other is enjoying while ahem, struggling. Why the struggle? It's to get these rusty old bones back on track. That's the thing about discontinuous dancing, you get rusty and you gotta work it all over again from square one.
Moreover, I'm now in some advanced class?!!! Well, initially I wasn't supposed to be in that class. But under some circumstances which are too complicated for me to describe, I ended up in the uh... advanced class, with the seniors who are oh-so-pro, and routines that I'd never learnt before... *Oh, I feel darn inferior!!! and useless... sob...*

Well, I know I need a lot of hard work to keep up with them. And hard work shall it be. I don't know how many times had I said this, but really, I won't give up. Why should I? When Sifu herself didn't give up on me. Only that she often laugh and tease me... bu bu bu... T.T

Gotta get better next lesson. I don't want to be FREQUENTLY teased again, although I'm not the only one who got teased... Lolx.. typical of Sifu. It's her way of communicating with us, lolx... cute!


Time to say bubie for now!!! I'll leave you with...