Day 50 - This Christmas

It's Christmas today, and I'm far away from home.

This year, Christmas is special. I had to spend it studying; instead of the usual carollings, open houses, parties and church. What a way to celebrate Christmas... sigh... and what's more, I'm away from home, away from all my loved ones.


And now, what are the types of hypothalamic hormones and their functions?

It could make me feel like breaking down any moment...

Pathetic as it could sound like, I am not alone. There are many out there, suffering the same fate as mine. And that made me feel not as lonely afterall.

No, actually I am not celebrating Christmas alone either. I have you, I have all your wishes, and most of all, I have God with me. ^_^



Thank you for the countdown. Thank you for the Christmas morning, it made the rest of my day. Ever got the feeling that the sunshine of the morning could last you even long after night falls?
Thank God for all the warm wishes, it gave me a taste of Christmas all the same, even when I am confined to my cell-like room, held by my own volition, with never-ending notes to study...
Thank God for my beautiful new dance shoes sent right up my doorsteps, just the nicest Christmas gift I could ever ask for myself.



Just that sometimes, I wish I could spend this Christmas closer to you, Father. And I'm sorry, just so so sorry that I didn't.

I'm sorry Lord for the things I've made it,
when it's all about you, it's all about you, Jesus...

But still, a blessed Christmas this is, afterall. Thank God for good health, lifted spirits and renewed faith...

Thank you Lord. Thank you for Christmas.


P/S: To you, if you might ever drop by; there might be times you'll fall, might be times you'll feel afraid of what the future might behold... but remember that there is always hope in God!!! And His is the only hope that never fails us. So we both give our best try k? And see where God brings us. Trust me, it'll be good. All will be well in the end. For God is good. Amen!

Day 36 - Sick

It sucks being sick. But that is what I am now.


It all started yesterday. Started off with fever, around afternoon. It didn't get any better at night. And I had sort of a sore throat, and flu symptoms starting up too. I was cold and freezing in the library, even with my sweater and lab coat on. I didn't feel warmer even when I went out of the library. And my temperature kept on rising. My body was hot as fire, but I felt cold as ice. Pretty torturing, to tell the truth. And worse still, I didn't have the strength to walk back to my Vista. My whole body was aching, my head throbbing and my chest paralyzed. On top of all that, I couldn't think straight. It was as though my brain wasn't functioning, and I was talking unconsciously. Seriously, I felt like dying, and it scares me. When I finally managed to get back home, I fell on my bed right away, shivering under my covers, I fell asleep.


Woke up this morning, sweating all over. I felt much better, my high fever had subsided. Just when I thought I am going to be alright, the nightmare came. I coughed and sneezed, and out came bloody sputum. I coughed a few more times, and out came more blood. T.T Heck, coughing up blood wasn't a good sign at all. I went to the toilet, and another nightmare struck me. There was blood in my urine too.


What now? I felt like a terminally ill patient. Gosh, would I die? Yes, seriously thoughts of dying filled my mind. You might say I am just too young and all, but truth is, I never thought of dying as something THAT far away as you all might say. For one, it could happen anytime...

Not that I am ready to die yet, though.

I was rushed to the clinic by my friend right after lectures. According to the doctor, I coincidently had cough, flu, and urinary tract infection. (UTI.. it's either that, or something worse... like... kidney problem... I dun wanna think about that... brrr.....) So he gave me a whole load of medicine, antibiotics too; and if I hadn't gotten better by Monday, I'll be subjected to further diagnosis. Whoa, that doesn't sound good at all. Hope that wouldn't happen to me. To be seeing the doctor once is bad enough, I don't want to end up revisiting him again and again. Please no...


And now, amongst all those worries and illness, I still had to study for my upcoming summatives. But then again, I don't think I could manage to study any good today, all that medicine is making me a little restless and drowsy... Think I'll take a short nap... maybe......... now....................

zzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZ....


P/S: Dear Father, is this my time? If it isn't, please heal me, grant me good health I pray. But if it is, O Lord, may I die a peaceful death. Then dear Lord, I pray that you would take me to heaven, to live with thee there... Whichever way it is, I succumb my all into your hands, and go where you would lead me to. Amen.